Romantic Torment

Forward

I’ve always found it difficult to go back, read something like this, and then be comfortable enough to post it for others to read. However, that’s exactly why it needs to be posted. I have to believe others may have felt the same at some point, and hey, it’s ok and you’re not alone.

What’s more important here is to remember that these are thoughts, written at an emotion point, and they should not be set in stone. It’s one perspective of my thinking at that time, and is in no way a final opinion on any subject. A quote I once read said, “Anger and rage is a temporary form of insanity,” and I believe that.

~ Romantic Torment, April 22nd, 2008

Journal Entry: Apr/13/2001

Here I sit listening to sappy music and crying my eyes out. I’m literally a mess right now. I’m reflecting on two people I lost in the past year and half. Two people that…were so close to me. My soul friend, Rex Daniel Judd, and my step-father, Nicholas Jr. Glynn. I’ve been told before by some that I’ve still not dealt with their deaths, and I sometimes wonder if its possible to ever totally deal with losing someone. Someone who…::breaks down and cries::

You know what? It’s not fair. Death. This life. This world. None of it. And it’s time for me to rant on it. We come into this fucking world with no answers, no explanations, and are just told to accept it. Well, ya know what…fuck that, fuck those beliefs, fuck all that your told, and fuck your faith.

What kind of god does not tend to his lost flock? And don’t give me that bullshit line that “one day heaven will come to earth.” If I hear that one more time I’m going to shove it down your fucking through until you choke on it. It’s not fair that someone must lose a loved one, and have not one fucking explanation as to why. As to why that person had to leave us, or where that person went to. What kind of benevolent god leaves us to find are own answers?

It’s one big fucking joke, and I’m sick of it.

Fuck society. Wake up and realize your ways are killing yourself and your children. And you wonder why there are shootings at school. Try being a parent, or don’t have children at all. Abortion all the way. Better then having some child grow up, and then out of hate for his life decides to shot my future child, or someone elses.

And don’t give me that pro-life bullshit either. If I hear that one more time I’m going to hurl. “Well that child may be the next president, or find the cure to cancer.” You fucking stupid idiot! If it’s meant to be, then it will be. Regardless if that embryo is destroyed. How fucking pathetic. It’s not your choice. It’s that individuals choice. STOP INTERFERING WITH OTHER PEOPLE’S LIVES YOU WORTHLESS EXCUSES OF HUMAN BEING. GRRRR!

I swear to god they make stupid laws for stupid people, or in hopes of protecting us from the stupid people. Speed limits? What the fuck are those for? If some idiot wants to do 100 down a freeway, and ends up splattered against the wall, well ya know what? Oh fucking well. Maybe the next fucking moron won’t go speeding down that freeway at 100 miles an hour. It’s one thing to make people aware of the dangers, but it’s a totally different matter when you start governing our choices! LET US LIVE OUR LIVES!

GOD I AM SO ANGRY AND PISSED WITH THINGS RIGHT NOW!